End Times

T. Maxim Simmler

Samuel sat on his porch when the Rapture happened.

He looked to his left, and saw Henry Bucks ascending in a velvet light.

“Bloody hell,” Samuel muttered. Bucks had always voted the Democrats. What was he doing up in the wide and glorious yonder?

A few feet away Dennis Hull and the Fisher boy floated upwards, holding hands.

“Don’t steal a rainbow, you poofs.” he shouted.

Was that guy on the horizon a Muslim?

Damn.

He spat on the planking and went inside.

“Guess what, Momma,” he said. “Belinda Carlisle was right. Heaven? It really is a place on earth.”

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